Week 36 - I never thought it would feel so real

It's finally starting to sink in that we're actually going to have another baby. You may laugh (haha ... ahhh) at the fact that it's just starting to sink in now but better late than never, right?

I'm now starting to get little *flashes* of the future:

• Sitting on the couch, breastfeeding, while Mela charges around the living room, dragging her little purse behind her and yammering away (we call it "shopping").
  
• Just the two of us, me and the little guy, up at 3 am and I'm watching him sleep.
  
• The smell of his head.
  
• The warm feeling of his little water-bottle-body curled up against me, like a puzzle piece I never knew was missing.
  
• His first gummy smile.
  
• Baby laundry (it's all so little!).
  
• The way newborns can fold up in the weirdest ways, like completely in half.
  
• The first picture of Mela and her brother together.
  
• Watching my husband hold his son.

I get little flashes of how much I'll love him and it takes my breath away.

***

Part of the reason his arrival is starting to become more real is because I actually, for a short time Monday night, had to consider the possibility that he was going to debut sooner than expected.

With Mela, I had some Braxton-Hicks contractions but not many and I couldn't really feel them. Well, apparently things change with your second!

This weekend for the first time, I had them off and on to the point of discomfort (having your uterus suddenly turn into a rock and suck all the air out of your lungs gets pretty old, fast).

Then on Monday night, around 8 pm, I noticed that they were coming on a pretty regular basis. So I tried to ignore it and went to bed to read for a while. Around 10:30, I was still wide awake and distracted by the discomfort (and mounting panic). I got up and decided to time the "contractions." They were 8 min apart. Exactly. Without fail. Which seemed a bit odd to me (B-Hicks contractions are supposed to be irregular / intermittent).

So, I tried to watch a movie (Wall Street - not interesting. Remind me to tape something good before my real labour). After a while, I started timing again and the contractions were now 5-6 minutes apart. And lasting around 55 seconds each. And starting to become more uncomfortable.

So, I tried to stay calm and started googling "false labour" and reading everything in sight. I was still pretty sure it wasn't the real thing, mostly because there wasn't any pain and I know I'm not that lucky.

Basically, everything said that the rule of thumb is 4-1-1 (4 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute, for at least 1 hour). At that point you're supposed to call the midwife / go to the hospital.

So I'm sitting there on the couch, facing the possibility that if things continued in the current direction, I was going to be heading to the hospital that night. ACK!

After about an hour of watching tv, eating oatmeal (I'd need my strength if I was going to head into labour without any sleep!) and repeatedly reassuring myself that this just a false alarm, the contractions started to space out. All of sudden, they were 10, 15 minutes apart.

Very relieved (and a little disappointed??), I could finally go to sleep and get some rest. Of course, I woke up every 2 hrs to time the contractions and make absolutely sure I wasn't in labour but they stayed at about 10-15 mins apart and by morning, finally started to space out even more.

So what have we learned from this? Braxton-Hicks contractions suck! And I finally understand how people can go to the hospital in false labour. I used to scoff and say, "When you're in labour, you'll know." Well, my labour with Mela started off with this exact same sensation for the first hour or so.

And when so-called "false" contractions are coming every 5 minutes and starting to be seriously uncomfortable, what are you supposed to think?!

The worst part is that they've continued off and on since then, too. The last couple nights (around the same time) they started to pick up but now I just ignore them in disgust and go to bed. They make me mad because they're uncomfortable but they don't actually mean anything (e.g. no indication of when the real labour will begin). I know, I know, they're the body's way of preparing for the main event but really ... how am I supposed to live like this for the next 4 - 5 weeks?!!!

At some point, I probably shouldn't be driving, actually, because it's seriously distracting to be heading through traffic and suddenly get hit by a rock-hard uterus!

I don't think Sutton appreciates it much either - after some of the contractions, he was squirming around a lot but he's kind of run out of room for much escape these days. How uncomfortable is that, to be squished in a sack that keeps compressing?!


p.s. I'm having one right now.